Post Game “Chat-iquette”?

Written by bloggermark

(Don and Debby have graciously allowed me to stick around, so here’s my guest blogger post!)

I’ve always wondered whether etiquette has emerged from the thousands of matches played through this site every month. For example, what should a game loser should say, if anything, via chat once the game is ended? What should the winner say?

I think of it like the end of a tennis match. The loser usually approaches the net first and extends a hand; likewise, when I lose a game (which is often these days!), I try to post quickly (“Nice game, congrats!”, “Great closing. Well done!”). The winner always responds with a simple thank-you, and if he/she wants to analyze the game, we may converse while the channel is open. When I win, I reply with a simple note of appreciation for the game. There’s no need to go on about my brilliant play, or how his/her mistake drew a narrow loss, or any other comment that would just be annoying.

What do you think? Do you rate the experience with a player based on post-game chat? What chat expectations, if any, do you have when you win? Do you say anything when you lose?

I know there are no right or wrong answers here, so let’s just share opinions and keep it lighthearted. :-)

Categories: Uncategorized

17 Responses to “Post Game “Chat-iquette”?”

  1. Matthew says:

    Open access chat for this or any game is pointless. Canned messages, is best. Too many people using this unrestricted chat as a way to cheat on their partners and I dont mean cheating within the game itself. The makers of this game are flirting with disaster and lawsuits. The makers if this game need to follow what Microsoft has done with their online games. Chat, yes. Canned messages, yes. Unrestricted open chat, no.

  2. angie says:

    is there a way u can delete the chat history on the f/b site… i loveeeeeee this game

  3. Surugo says:

    It’s too easy to resign accidentally and there us no way to retract a mistaken resignation. Somebody please fix!

  4. ( O o) says:

    I say nothing at the beginning unless I’m responding to a message from my opponent. Perhaps it’s because when I start a new random game, I’m feeling more competitive than friendly. If my opponent rematches me after their loss (ha), then there’s more likelihood of chatting, and I’m open to basic, friendly banter during a game. Again, mostly if started by my opponent.
    I try to be honest if I say “Gg” after a game, so no, I don’t automatically say it. If I’ve clearly been the better player, there’s also the danger of coming across as disingenuous or patronizing.
    I’ve never played in tournament, so I’m unfamiliar with that passing ettiquette, but I will certainly pass with my first move if I think I can make a better word off of my opponent, and it certainly doesn’t have to be a bingo. If my opponent passes, then unless I have a bingo, I’m wont to pass back to them. Besides the bingo/good word scenario, the player may not be able to make a word, but otherwise like the letters they have, and so opts for the pass instead of a swap. Either way, I like to force their hand. I’ve won by third-pass resignation more than once, but the only time it’s vaguely satisfying is well after the start, when an opponent who has given up on the game but wont resign doesn’t seem to realize what a third pass will do.
    Questioning a player about a word must be done with care. There’s no point in asking the meaning of a word, given information resources available to us all on one hand, and any player’s ability to guess words on the other. If I think someone is cheating, I might say something, but only if it is blatant. If someone thinks I’m cheating, I tend to detail for them my thought processes leading up to the use of the word/words in question. I dont mind revealing my strategy and tactics in those situations, and it works better than only saying “I’m not cheating. I’m a good player. ”
    A chat message to accompany a goodwill first pass sounds like a good idea to me, if that’s the way you play.

    • Marc says:

      Agree with many points in this post. I also like to chat if I suspect my opponent is cheating, as the response can be enlightening. Someone littering the board with obscure BINGOs yet cannot construct a halfway intelligent sentence, well, pretty much speaks for itself. :)

      • Sheila Kurtz says:

        not related b ut i am sick…i installed new system 7.1 and lost my words with friends i installed another one and they put in games from 3 years ago.. is there any way to retrieve my 10 games currently playing

  5. zboudreau says:

    I always say “Thanks for the game!” whether I win or lose and usually get a nice parting comment from my opponent.

  6. jcom10 says:

    Hi Mark! I’m always pleased to see your name on the site. Beyond the subject of”chat”, but still under the heading of “etiquette”, I have another question. I play a lot of players who follow another form of “courtesy-in-play”. Whenever we initiate a non-tournament game as the “challenger”, we will “pass” on the first turn. Out of courtesy and the intellectual nature of this game, the “pass” represents the willingness to give one’s opponent the privilege and option of first move. However, when chatting someone on this website (playing Hangin’ with Friends), she mentioned that she was always suspicious of someone who passes on the first move, thinking that they have a “bingo” waiting in the wings to build and gain more points off of her first move! Again, I’m referring to non-tournament games. What do you and others think?

    • bloggermark says:

      Thanks, Jay! You were one of the first and still one of the best, both as a competitor and a gentleman (if people will pardon the love-fest, LOL!)

      I see the pass as a sign that the opponent is happy with that hand. I thus am inclined to put a stinker down, like OE or AA. (“Work with that!” I say) But I can appreciate the spirit with which you do it. If you had advantage in mind, you would swap if you had no bingo already lined up.

      If I were in a non-tournament match with an admitted beginner (or at any stage below me), I would gladly pass the first move. If that gesture were understood properly, then it could foster goodwill. But if misunderstood, it could look be reminiscent of Bobby Fischer letting his clock run down on the first move. Mind games.

      As usual, no right answers. But interesting thoughts on the “meaning” of the pass.

      • Marty says:

        I like that Idea Jay. When hitting up a fav, regular, its like the courtesy of oppening the door of th WWF clubhouse for them to go through 1st. ( but then there’s the Gentleman / Lady thingy! … sould I ~ could I, expect Debs to hold it open for me? lol)
        Why be suspicious of 1st pass? if you think it tactical, just pass right back if you want. 3rd pass is game over right?
        Mark is right, Jay goes way back and I have a fond memory of our 1st game, well over a year ago. It was incredible fun, challenging and tacticle. My loss was less than my boost when Jay commented that I was an excellent opponent.

        Pause in play “etiquette”.

        Unannounced stops in Tourney play of more than an hour can be ever so slightly annoying. Especially no ZZZ ZZZ heads up (down). When your focused on a tourney game it puzzles me how an opponent can leave you hangging for want of a brief chat message? Have been guilty of it myself sometimes but try to keep Opp. informed so as to waste least anticipation and time. I mostly try to find time differece at the start.
        Am I fickle n fussy? how do others feel ? can we improve awareness?

    • Debby says:

      If it was a courtesy that you were passing then why not put that in your chat letting your opponent know what a gentleman you are? lol

  7. Liz Bicknell says:

    I think you should always say SOMETHING at the beginning and end of each game. Saying nothing is open to too many interpretations–from a benign interpretation: “you’re probably shy” to the less benign: “you’re arrogant and unfriendly.”

    I’m not particularly chatty during the game, but I always congratulate my opponent on a good play or a bingo, and I sometimes gently question the meaning of an unfamiliar word.

    I also read up on players on the results page when I’m matched against them, particularly in the monthly challenge, which is often VERY revealing!

    Thanks for asking the question!

  8. mom2boys3girls says:

    I often am not able to say GG at the end since chat line closes too soon, but I do always comment on the game results. I think it’s more important to do that then privately on the game. I rematch all my regular players so we only commet on extraordinary plays or long absences unless we are just plain chatting about life & such.

  9. Mias_dad says:

    Hi Guys, I’m new to this site, played my first daily challenge yesterday.
    I always start the game with ‘hi, good luck :) ’.
    If my opponent responds then I will add ‘nice word’ when they play a big score, or important placing. At the end of the game, ‘thanks for the game’ if I win, and add ‘well played’ if they win.
    Common courtesy, I believe. However, if the opponent does not respond to my initial comment, I make no further comments as they clearly don’t want to chat!

  10. Scooteristi says:

    If you play on Facebook the chat line closes immediately at the end of the game.

  11. hardcle says:

    I always try to say “hi” at the beginning of the game and “good game” at the end, win or lose, regardless of score. I feel it’s a courtesy to your opponent that acknowledges their contribution to the game. Playing against different people is what makes the game fun and acknowledging your opponent is a small price to pay for that. If my opponent doesn’t respond I’m likely to knock a star off my rating.

  12. Kellz says:

    Win or lose, the quickest and easiest way usually is just to say “GG”! Nuff said…. Chat line closed!